dear huimin,

im sorry for not taking your opinions before cancelling the study groups. i know we should have just gone ahead and do our own studying instead of well, cancelling it and having fun.

i admit we have been slacking and our group isnt doing quite IDEAL but this is the best it can go i believe. i know you dont really like this group and all but i do hope that you'll tell us, so we would know what you're thinking because well. we're not blessed with telepathy. we dont know what you're thinking. whats more, i only knew you this year so well. yea. i have to get closer to you to know you more see.

i knew you only this year, after getting closer to jinting and sihui. and really, before this, i really disliked you. i've heard so many horrrible things about you and i was truely scared. i was affected by the rumors i've heard from others and i know how wrong that is. thats why i decided to include you into this study group. reasons.?

1. i thought i could make it up to you for what i've always thought of you.
2. i felt that.. you needed company.

im sorry if i felt that you're quite lonely but thats what i see with my own eyes. i thought maybe we could provide you with some company so well. there you are in here.

but you misunderstood my dear. we do not truely need you. we didnt add you in because you're exceptionally good or anything. we added you in because we truely wanted to make it up to you, to be friends with you. but you said something like we only treat you nicely when we need you and throw you away when we dont.

no my dear, thats not the case. we did not intend to throw you away at all.! its only that we believe that the study group shouldnt be held on the certain day, so we cancelled it. i know how wrong this is and i wouldnt cancel it anymore without everyone's opinion so well yea. but we didnt treat you badly. in fact, we're like the few who has been trying to make you feel comfortable. even i, trying to get you to open up to me. but i guess its all not working out.

as for the pang seh thing, i really do hope you'll think it over and hopefully realised what went wrong and take back your words. we did not pang seh you. although we are considered your friends ( i guess ) but it doesnt mean that we HAVE to hang out with you wherever you're going. plus, you did not inform us that you wanted to tag along and all. so its not even called pang seh. so well. if you felt left out, im sorry. please let us know so we'll know what to do yea.?

you do realise that you've made both jinting and sihui blow their top. i did too, but not my top of course. i take back what i said in my earlier post. but really, if you dislike us and not want to be a part of us, tell me. we'll just leave. we just want to let you know that we're not using you. we just hope to be your friends and that you'll open up to us. i know you've been having problems and keeping to yourself isnt working out. i know you have friends like andrew and jason but really. dont you think you need one in school too.?

recently, i've heard so much about you trying to get ciggs. i really thank god that you did not manage to get hold of one. what has happened in your life that you want to destroy it.? i really want to know whats going on but i just dont get the trust from you. maybe to you, we're just people who accompany you in school. if thats what you think then you're wrong. i truely want to be your friend but getting comments like that from you is really hurting. i have nothing more to say then apologise and tell you how i really REALLY feel about you.

i hope you're not offended and you'll reflect on what i've said.

the main points :

we're not using you.
we want to be your friends.
we did not pang seh you because we're not obliged to hang out with you.
try to open to others and take life seriously.
smoking sucks and it isnt cool.
we're all sorry.

think it over okay.

god bless,
amanda.